Chuck Norris: On Obama's 'Political Stink' -- And He's Out to Steal Your 'Wallet'

' Chuck Norris sure hasn't mellowed since barnstorming for Mike Huckabee back in the spring (and warning that John McCain might drop dead at any moment).  In his latest syndicated column, he boasts about working for Prop 8 in California to ban gay marriage, then adds: "And as far as the presidential race? I couldn't put it any better than a recent poem I received,"  a takeoff on 'Twas the Night Before Christmas.   He concludes by calling Obama a "socialist." Here are some excerpts, courtesy Chuck:

When all of a sudden/There arose such a noise/I peered out of my window/ Saw Obama and his boys.

They had come for my wallet./ They wanted my pay/ To give to the others,/ Who had not worked a day!

He snatched up my money /And quick as a wink /Jumped back on his bandwagon/ As I gagged from the political stink.

He then rallied his henchmen,/ Who were pulling his cart./ I could tell they were out /To tear my country apart!

They took off for his cause, /And as he flew out of sight,/ I heard him laugh at the nation, /Who wouldn't stand up and fight!

UPDATE: Chuck has now written an open letter to the president-elect urging him to take four vital steps.  He also vows that he will be praying for him -- but Americans ("especially me") will be keeping an eye on him all the time.

Comments

[vanderleun]

Well, that's all very interesting but what readers would most like to know is how soon VNU is going to downsize or fold the least of their properties, E&P?

We expect the same balanced coverage on this issue that E&P brings to the rest of its "work."

[Mickey Martin]

Chuck Norris is a drunken wash-up who does not deserve our attention for any reason. He is a true american zero.

[camenbert]

Yes, I always consult the renowned political expert Chuck Norris before making any political decisions. He is terribly knowledgeable and fit for Germany in the 1930s. Now, if I had a faux POW to free from a faux POW camp in Vietnam, I would not hesitate to call him, if he could just pull out of Kristy.

[adventurephoto]

Chuck, you're a neanderthal, lizard-brained, non-thinker. Now get out of the way and let's get some stuff accomplished. You are part of the problem and not the solution.

[julianne]

Boy, it's a good thing old Chuck doesn't have to rely on intelligence to make a living or he'd starve.

Of course he's angry - the tax cut he's been receiving will now disappear and benefit the middle class. Nice Christian values there chuck. You're a lousy actor and pundit. Get lost.

[Jim From Philadelphia]

Chuck obviously did no good for Huckabee. He should stick to movies because no one cares about his old washed-up right wing minority views.

[June]

Washed up has been seeking attention. Go away!

[seattalite]

I SO AGREE with camenbert:

Chuck, you're a LIZARD-BRAINED, NON...THINKER.

GET THE FUCK....OUT OF THE WAY....

We NEED TO GET SHIT ACCOMPLISHED!!!

You're PART OF THE PROBLEM!

NOT The SOLUTION!!!

With OBAMA....We're FINALLY GOING TO GET POSITIVE THINGS....DONE!!!!!

OBAMA 2012!!!!

[ed shapiro]

Poor Chuck Norris he has to quote T'was The Night Before Xmas. A sacred childrens joy and turn it into his own selfish misery. he probably thought it was cool but truly he is a fool. Poor poor chuck Norris.

[Trent Baur]

Chuck Norris is an idiot. Mike Huckabee talked up a much greater populist economic message than Obama ever did. How do he think Huckabee was going to accomplish evening out income inequality in this country?

Would Chuck have been talking about resisting the mad redistributing President Huckabee who has come to take his hard earned money?

Yet another dumb Republican basing their politics on the cults of personality and god, without any clue about the actual issues.

[MrsD]

Brawn v brain.
Sorry, Chuckie,
Brain wins.

[monkeyhateclean]

Chuck: STFU. Nobody cares what you really think. You're only a caricature anyway.

Buh-bye.

[William Budd]

Hmmmm, looks like chuck to a few to many shots in the head over the years.
Sorry chuck, your brand has had it's chance and managed to fail completely in every area on pretty much every level.
Somebody else gets a chance now.

[Kevin g]

No one cared about chuck norris before the chuck norris jokes, and now that theyre milked, dead, and buried, no one cares now.

[sandy]

Wow,you guys are tough and funny as heck! I love intelligent people.

[Rob]

Go back to kicking stunt men. Loser.

[sandy]

Wow,you guys are tough and funny as heck! I love intelligent people.

[Godiva]

Why does the "B" movie king think he has a voice???

[dan]

Ummmmmm.....Chuck supported a guy that thinks we humans used to hang out with dinosaurs.

Shouldn't that pretty much disqualify Chuck from being relevant?

[Lisa]

What a loser this guy is. I love how the most irrelevant "stars" have come out in support of the Repubs. They're irrelevant b/c they were never very interesting or intelligent or talented to begin with (for another example, please see Janine Turner- if that's even her name, I don't know- she's that much of a nobody). Backing Repubs and/or attacking the intelligent Democratics is the only airtime they'll get. How sad for them.

[Lisa]

What a loser this guy is. I love how the most irrelevant "stars" have come out in support of the Repubs. They're irrelevant b/c they were never very interesting or intelligent or talented to begin with (for another example, please see Janine Turner- if that's even her name, I don't know- she's that much of a nobody). Backing Repubs and/or attacking the intelligent Democratics is the only airtime they'll get. How sad for them.

[CommonSense]

Chuck,
This is why Bruce Lee kicked your ass in "Return of the Dragon"!

[CommonSense]

Chuck,
This is why Bruce Lee kicked your ass in "Return of the Dragon"!

[CommonSense]

Chuck,
This is why Bruce Lee kicked your ass in "Return of the Dragon"!

[CommonSense]

Chuck,
This is why Bruce Lee kicked your ass in "Return of the Dragon"!